I recently watched the movie, “Sir” (available on Netflix). It’s a story of two protagonists: a man (Ashwin, aka ‘Sir’) belonging to a wealthy family in Mumbai, and a woman (Ratna) who works as the full-time maid at his house. Over the course of the movie, we see Ashwin begin to fall for Ratna, and the struggles that stem from the class differences between them.
I’ll be honest: I loved this film. It felt relatable, showing the lives of maids that many Indians living in the urban setup have grown up seeing. I also loved the characters, who felt real yet inspiring in their personalities, each in their own way. Ratna, as the young widow aspiring to become a fashion designer and break away from the poverty and class barriers surrounding her and her family. And Ashwin, a young man dealing with his own personal problems, but at all times, treating Ratna with politeness and respect, without caring about class expectations.
The movie holds up a mirror to the way urban India generally treats its domestic help, without being overly dramatic. When Ratna interrupts a conversation between Ashwin and his sister to ask whether she should lay out dinner, her sister rudely lashes out at her for the interruption. When Ratna accidentally drops wine on a guest’s dress, she is yelled at and humiliated in front of everyone by the guest. Common words like “moron” and people like “them” are thrown, a generalization that we’ve seen all too often used when talking about domestic help in our country. There’s also a shot of the camera following Ranta from behind as she moves through a party serving food to guests. The viewers get to see from her angle how more often than not, she’s ignored, as though she’s non-existent in that room, a faceless, nameless person existing only to serve the upper class.
In the backdrop of this reality, Ashwin’s behaviour towards Ratna is refreshing. It’s not as though he goes out of his way (at least not initially) to cross the class barriers. He doesn’t ask her to sit on the table and chair with him, or give her a bigger room in exchange for the small servant’s quarter she resides in. As much as I hate to say this, that would be unrealistic in a world where servants are treated as nobodies (however, at some point Ashwin does ask Ratna if it doesn’t bother her to have to sit on the floor in the kitchen and eat after feeding everyone).
Instead, the film takes baby steps, and shows simple ways of treating people with humanity regardless of the class they come from. It’s something as simple as saying “please” and “thank you” - words our country reserves only for people of the same or higher class. It’s as simple as smiling and looking at the person when talking to them. It’s something as simple as using a calm and polite tone of voice. It’s as simple as saying “sorry” when you have said something to hurt their feelings, regardless of their social status. It’s as simple as refusing to stoop to the level of humiliating your maid at your party, even at the risk of offending a guest.
I’m using the word ‘simple’, but in reality, they hardly seem simple for most people. I’m starting with highlighting these points, because this is the most basic level of humanity that the film asks us to reflect upon. I’m sure a large section of the audience will look at the love story between the two characters (which I will get to below), and write it off as bizarre and unrealistic. So before we get to the parts that seem too big to fathom, maybe let’s at least start with the smaller, simpler steps. Sure, don’t fall in love with your maids. But at least start treating them with the level of respect that all humans deserve.
Now, let’s come to the elephant in the room: the love story between Ashwin and Ratna. In terms of class relations, it's blasphemous. Of course, we come across the occasional anecdotes about men having sex with their maids, but rarely do they fall in love with them, the way Ashwin does with Ratna. He respects her and trusts her as a person, and genuinely seems to want to be with her, regardless of what people say. When we say that movies play a role in shaping how society thinks, Ashwin’s character is the kind of shaping that our society needs.
But while Ashwin provides us the window into the ideal society, Ratna holds up a mirror to the real society as we exist today. She gifts him a shirt on his birthday, but insists that he doesn’t tell anyone it’s from her. She is hesitant to be seen with him in public in any way that might lead to people talking about them. There’s a dialogue in particular that I felt drove the point home, when Ashwin asks Ratna to go out with him:
Ratna: Log mazaak udayenge (People will make fun of us)
Ashwin: Kaun log? (Which people?)
Ratna: Raju...Watchman...Sab log (Raju, watchman, everyone)
Ashwin: Mujhe farak nahi padta (I don’t care)
Ratna: Mujhe padta hai, Sir (I care, Sir)
While Ashwin can choose to not care about what people will think, that’s a luxury Ratna cannot afford. Her dignity is bound to her class status, and to her adhering to its rules. She can’t ‘choose’ to ignore the societal pressures and expectations, because they come at the very real risk of becoming a social outcast or even losing her employment. She has seen how people like her are treated and mistreated by the upper class. She knows that no matter how much it bothers Ashwin, her place is always going to be on the floor, and never on the dining table. Ultimately, the choice of not caring about social obligations is one that’s limited to the rich.
Ratna’s fears are warranted. Ashwin’s friend points out to him the bizarreness with which the rest of the world will view their situation. He exclaims point blank, “But she’s your maid”. That’s really the only argument needed, because that in itself carries all the social conditioning that’s ingrained into us. “Your mom wouldn’t even sit on the same table as her,” he adds, validating the thoughts that Ratna shares about her place in this society. “People will never let her forget that she’s a maid. Your maid.”
I liked this interaction. Because while it started with almost putting the blame on the fact that Ratna is a maid, it moved on to admit that ultimately, it is the society that is a problem, as it will not be able to accept her into its ranks. And I think that’s really the crux of the film: a critique of our society as it currently exists.
Our country comes from a long history of casteism, and in some ways, I’d like to believe that we have taken some steps to challenge that. Of course, casteism still stands very strongly, but at least we’ve reached a place where people are able to talk about it as a problem. Few families (admittedly, very few) are trying to move away from caste based relations in matrimonial sites. People are becoming more vocal and critical about honour killings, and atrocities committed against Dalits.
But while these are great steps (albeit small ones) towards becoming a more humane society, I think we use this as a way to pat ourselves on our backs and congratulate ourselves for our progressive outlook, all the while ignoring the daily discrimination we met out in the form of class dynamics.
Maybe it’s invisible to us, but that discrimination exists. It exists in the way we talk to our domestic help, ordering them around without something as basic as a ‘please’ or ‘thank you’. It exists in the way we talk about our domestic help, clubbing them into a category of “them” and generalizing them as “these people” so that we can then criticize them as a group. It exists when we keep separate utensils for them to eat and drink from. It exists when we don’t allow them to sit on chairs or beds, or else provide them a separate stool on which to sit. It exists when we don’t allow them to use the bathrooms in our house, forcing them to hold in their bodily urges for hours on end. It exists when we cut their salaries for taking a day off, while we expect our employers to give us casual leaves and sick leaves and every other possible kind of leave - in addition to the weekends.
All of this ultimately stems from the belief of seeing them as “them”; someone who is an “other”, different from us. And not just any “other”, but an “other” who is lesser than us in a way, someone we can look down at rather than see as an equal. Sure, you can say that they’re employees, not family, but we don’t even deign to treat them as employees - we expect our bosses to treat us as human beings, but do we do the same for the people who work for us?
Throughout the film, Ashwin asks Ratna to stop calling him ‘Sir’ - a direct reference to the class divide that separates the two of them. The very last scene of the movie ends with her calling him ‘Ashwin’ - a brief moment in which she lets down her guard and lets herself feel the emotions that years of social conditioning have compelled her to drown. Unrealistic? Inspiring? Hopeful? Bizarre? I guess that’s for each of us to decide on our own.
On a final note, I think one other aspect of the movie I want to call out is the way it portrays its characters - major and minor. People aren’t fitted into categories of good or bad. The woman who cheats on her fiance is also shown to be kind to the domestic help. The mother who would not accept her son being with a maid is also dealing with her own trauma of having lost another son. The maid (Ratna) who refuses to break the social barriers of class and be in a relationship with her employer is still challenging the status quo by chasing her dreams and often refusing to care about what people will think.
What the movie does really well is hold up a mirror to our society. It shows us our biases. It shows us the complexities within people. It shows us that anyone trying to break free from the biases is mostly pulled back down by the crowd. But it also does is show us a window: a window into the world as it could be - simpler, more equal, more understanding, more humane. It’s up to the viewers to introspect and decide which kind of world they want to live in.
I’ll be honest: I loved this film. It felt relatable, showing the lives of maids that many Indians living in the urban setup have grown up seeing. I also loved the characters, who felt real yet inspiring in their personalities, each in their own way. Ratna, as the young widow aspiring to become a fashion designer and break away from the poverty and class barriers surrounding her and her family. And Ashwin, a young man dealing with his own personal problems, but at all times, treating Ratna with politeness and respect, without caring about class expectations.
The movie holds up a mirror to the way urban India generally treats its domestic help, without being overly dramatic. When Ratna interrupts a conversation between Ashwin and his sister to ask whether she should lay out dinner, her sister rudely lashes out at her for the interruption. When Ratna accidentally drops wine on a guest’s dress, she is yelled at and humiliated in front of everyone by the guest. Common words like “moron” and people like “them” are thrown, a generalization that we’ve seen all too often used when talking about domestic help in our country. There’s also a shot of the camera following Ranta from behind as she moves through a party serving food to guests. The viewers get to see from her angle how more often than not, she’s ignored, as though she’s non-existent in that room, a faceless, nameless person existing only to serve the upper class.
In the backdrop of this reality, Ashwin’s behaviour towards Ratna is refreshing. It’s not as though he goes out of his way (at least not initially) to cross the class barriers. He doesn’t ask her to sit on the table and chair with him, or give her a bigger room in exchange for the small servant’s quarter she resides in. As much as I hate to say this, that would be unrealistic in a world where servants are treated as nobodies (however, at some point Ashwin does ask Ratna if it doesn’t bother her to have to sit on the floor in the kitchen and eat after feeding everyone).
Instead, the film takes baby steps, and shows simple ways of treating people with humanity regardless of the class they come from. It’s something as simple as saying “please” and “thank you” - words our country reserves only for people of the same or higher class. It’s as simple as smiling and looking at the person when talking to them. It’s something as simple as using a calm and polite tone of voice. It’s as simple as saying “sorry” when you have said something to hurt their feelings, regardless of their social status. It’s as simple as refusing to stoop to the level of humiliating your maid at your party, even at the risk of offending a guest.
I’m using the word ‘simple’, but in reality, they hardly seem simple for most people. I’m starting with highlighting these points, because this is the most basic level of humanity that the film asks us to reflect upon. I’m sure a large section of the audience will look at the love story between the two characters (which I will get to below), and write it off as bizarre and unrealistic. So before we get to the parts that seem too big to fathom, maybe let’s at least start with the smaller, simpler steps. Sure, don’t fall in love with your maids. But at least start treating them with the level of respect that all humans deserve.
Now, let’s come to the elephant in the room: the love story between Ashwin and Ratna. In terms of class relations, it's blasphemous. Of course, we come across the occasional anecdotes about men having sex with their maids, but rarely do they fall in love with them, the way Ashwin does with Ratna. He respects her and trusts her as a person, and genuinely seems to want to be with her, regardless of what people say. When we say that movies play a role in shaping how society thinks, Ashwin’s character is the kind of shaping that our society needs.
But while Ashwin provides us the window into the ideal society, Ratna holds up a mirror to the real society as we exist today. She gifts him a shirt on his birthday, but insists that he doesn’t tell anyone it’s from her. She is hesitant to be seen with him in public in any way that might lead to people talking about them. There’s a dialogue in particular that I felt drove the point home, when Ashwin asks Ratna to go out with him:
Ratna: Log mazaak udayenge (People will make fun of us)
Ashwin: Kaun log? (Which people?)
Ratna: Raju...Watchman...Sab log (Raju, watchman, everyone)
Ashwin: Mujhe farak nahi padta (I don’t care)
Ratna: Mujhe padta hai, Sir (I care, Sir)
While Ashwin can choose to not care about what people will think, that’s a luxury Ratna cannot afford. Her dignity is bound to her class status, and to her adhering to its rules. She can’t ‘choose’ to ignore the societal pressures and expectations, because they come at the very real risk of becoming a social outcast or even losing her employment. She has seen how people like her are treated and mistreated by the upper class. She knows that no matter how much it bothers Ashwin, her place is always going to be on the floor, and never on the dining table. Ultimately, the choice of not caring about social obligations is one that’s limited to the rich.
Ratna’s fears are warranted. Ashwin’s friend points out to him the bizarreness with which the rest of the world will view their situation. He exclaims point blank, “But she’s your maid”. That’s really the only argument needed, because that in itself carries all the social conditioning that’s ingrained into us. “Your mom wouldn’t even sit on the same table as her,” he adds, validating the thoughts that Ratna shares about her place in this society. “People will never let her forget that she’s a maid. Your maid.”
I liked this interaction. Because while it started with almost putting the blame on the fact that Ratna is a maid, it moved on to admit that ultimately, it is the society that is a problem, as it will not be able to accept her into its ranks. And I think that’s really the crux of the film: a critique of our society as it currently exists.
Our country comes from a long history of casteism, and in some ways, I’d like to believe that we have taken some steps to challenge that. Of course, casteism still stands very strongly, but at least we’ve reached a place where people are able to talk about it as a problem. Few families (admittedly, very few) are trying to move away from caste based relations in matrimonial sites. People are becoming more vocal and critical about honour killings, and atrocities committed against Dalits.
But while these are great steps (albeit small ones) towards becoming a more humane society, I think we use this as a way to pat ourselves on our backs and congratulate ourselves for our progressive outlook, all the while ignoring the daily discrimination we met out in the form of class dynamics.
Maybe it’s invisible to us, but that discrimination exists. It exists in the way we talk to our domestic help, ordering them around without something as basic as a ‘please’ or ‘thank you’. It exists in the way we talk about our domestic help, clubbing them into a category of “them” and generalizing them as “these people” so that we can then criticize them as a group. It exists when we keep separate utensils for them to eat and drink from. It exists when we don’t allow them to sit on chairs or beds, or else provide them a separate stool on which to sit. It exists when we don’t allow them to use the bathrooms in our house, forcing them to hold in their bodily urges for hours on end. It exists when we cut their salaries for taking a day off, while we expect our employers to give us casual leaves and sick leaves and every other possible kind of leave - in addition to the weekends.
All of this ultimately stems from the belief of seeing them as “them”; someone who is an “other”, different from us. And not just any “other”, but an “other” who is lesser than us in a way, someone we can look down at rather than see as an equal. Sure, you can say that they’re employees, not family, but we don’t even deign to treat them as employees - we expect our bosses to treat us as human beings, but do we do the same for the people who work for us?
Throughout the film, Ashwin asks Ratna to stop calling him ‘Sir’ - a direct reference to the class divide that separates the two of them. The very last scene of the movie ends with her calling him ‘Ashwin’ - a brief moment in which she lets down her guard and lets herself feel the emotions that years of social conditioning have compelled her to drown. Unrealistic? Inspiring? Hopeful? Bizarre? I guess that’s for each of us to decide on our own.
On a final note, I think one other aspect of the movie I want to call out is the way it portrays its characters - major and minor. People aren’t fitted into categories of good or bad. The woman who cheats on her fiance is also shown to be kind to the domestic help. The mother who would not accept her son being with a maid is also dealing with her own trauma of having lost another son. The maid (Ratna) who refuses to break the social barriers of class and be in a relationship with her employer is still challenging the status quo by chasing her dreams and often refusing to care about what people will think.
What the movie does really well is hold up a mirror to our society. It shows us our biases. It shows us the complexities within people. It shows us that anyone trying to break free from the biases is mostly pulled back down by the crowd. But it also does is show us a window: a window into the world as it could be - simpler, more equal, more understanding, more humane. It’s up to the viewers to introspect and decide which kind of world they want to live in.
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