In the Land of Men

It was a girls' trip
A much awaited one
To shed the weight of daily life
And enter the paradise
Where the sea meets the sand
And when we finally got there
Excited
Relaxed
Feeling the holiday calm take over
We scanned the beach
Looking for a spot
Away from the crowd
Unfettered by humans
(Only inhabited by dogs)
After a quick search
We found the perfect spot
Refreshed ourselves with drinks
And made our way into the water
Empty
But for a family nearby
And as that water touched our toes
It washed away all the stress
The waves fighting the heat on our backs
As we splashed
And jumped
And swam
And soaked in that feeling
Of the perfect holiday
But what felt like hours
Was only a few minutes
Because that’s all it took
For the inhabitants to grow
For people passing by
To stop and stare
And what had minutes ago
Been our empty paradise
Suddenly became
A congregation of bodies
Or, to be more specific
A congregation of men
Staring
Leering
Inching closer
And I’m ashamed to say
That part of me even wondered
If we were the problem
If the wet T-shirt
Sticking to my body
Was the problem
Or if the shorts
Chosen instead of a swimsuit
Were the problem
If we should have dressed differently
If we should have picked a different spot
If we should have skipped the drinks
If we should have travelled with male friends
If we shouldn’t have jumped around as much
Because as their gazes
Travelled over every inch of our wet clothes
That familiar fear
And feeling of disgust
That we had become so accustomed to
That we had wanted to escape from
Came back in full force
And just like that
Our bubble was burst
Reality came crashing down
At the end of it all
This wasn’t paradise
This wasn’t our getaway
This was the nightmare
That we lived every single day
A reminder
That no matter where we went
We would always be
In the land of men.

*********

[This was a post that I had begun to write a few years ago, after a Goa trip with a friend. After this incident, her words to me were, "Ruch, I hope you're going to write about this!" It took a while, but finally managed to go back and complete it].