"I stand in the middle of a crowd, shouting at the top of my voice, but no one can hear me."
I always thought this was a metaphor. But standing in front of my 41 kids, trying to project my cracked voice over the combination of theirs gave an entirely new meaning to that metaphor.
I came to India because I wanted to come back home. I came to Teach for India because I wanted to transform the lives of kids. So far, all I have transformed is my voice. Actually, at one time it was a voice; now, it's just a croak.
Standing in that crowd shouting at the top of my lungs, I felt a wave of helplessness wash over me. What if every day is like this for the next 2 years? Will I go in every day eager for a new beginning, and end every day questioning my decision to be in this classroom? Will I keep shouting at my kids and turn into the very teachers I used to detest, or will I just sit there helplessly waiting - hoping - that they notice the person standing in front of them and decide to quiet down? Because if this is the case, forget transform - I won't be able to teach them a single thing over 2 years.
True, there is a silver lining in each cloud. If winter comes can spring be far behind. Change takes time.
Heard all that.
But at this very moment, there is no silver lining, no sign of spring, and no time to waste.
I always thought this was a metaphor. But standing in front of my 41 kids, trying to project my cracked voice over the combination of theirs gave an entirely new meaning to that metaphor.
I came to India because I wanted to come back home. I came to Teach for India because I wanted to transform the lives of kids. So far, all I have transformed is my voice. Actually, at one time it was a voice; now, it's just a croak.
Standing in that crowd shouting at the top of my lungs, I felt a wave of helplessness wash over me. What if every day is like this for the next 2 years? Will I go in every day eager for a new beginning, and end every day questioning my decision to be in this classroom? Will I keep shouting at my kids and turn into the very teachers I used to detest, or will I just sit there helplessly waiting - hoping - that they notice the person standing in front of them and decide to quiet down? Because if this is the case, forget transform - I won't be able to teach them a single thing over 2 years.
True, there is a silver lining in each cloud. If winter comes can spring be far behind. Change takes time.
Heard all that.
But at this very moment, there is no silver lining, no sign of spring, and no time to waste.
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