Remember when you were a little kid, and were constantly told by adults - don't put your hand out of the car window, don't touch that knife, don't get wet in the rain, don't run down the stairs, don't stand too close to the door in the train, don't run, don't stand, don't sit, don't talk - just don't.
And the whole time there was just one thought running through your head - Aaaaaaaaarrrrghhhhhhhhh!!!
Why did adults have to be so negative all the time?! Were they programmed to say the words "don't" or "no"? Do they really have no faith in children? Do they really think I'm so stupid as to intentionally burn my hand with an iron? Please, I know it is hot! (from experience...)
I promised myself that when I became an adult, I would never treat kids as though they were incapable to doing anything correctly - I'd let them try new things, make their own mistakes, learn from their mistakes. I'll show the adults around me how it's really done. Now all I needed to do was find myself a kid or two...
I found 45 of them. And in the words of Russell Peters - I turned grouchy adult so fast...!!!
Every request that came my way automatically met with a no.
No, you cannot run in the corridor. No, you cannot jump on the benches. They're kids. They're tiny kids. They don't know any better. I'm the adult around here. I can't let them go haywire. I'll have to say no.
Yep, I became the very adult version I had always told myself I'd never be.
But today, standing at the doorway of a local train, I was just reminiscing about all those times as a kid when I was told not to stand too close to the edge, and I couldn't help but wonder why adults become such boring grouches when we're around kids. Is it that I don't trust my kids? Do I really think they're going to jump out of the window of the bus if it is open too wide?
After mulling over this for 30 minutes in the Bombay local, I came to one simple explanation - fear. I have been given the responsibility of 45 children, and I think this responsibility is scarier than being responsible for a multinational corporation. Because one small incident could end disastrously. Sure, the odds of something going wrong are probably less than 5%, but even that is too much for the side of me that is scared of "what if something goes wrong". It's easy to be responsible for yourself, but not so much for others. Especially when the others belong to someone else, and your careless gaze could be the reason for a family shattering to pieces. I have no problem with my kids running down the stairs, but every time one of them falls and gets hurt, the guilt weighs down as I have to face their parents.
So I don't think the problem is that adults don't trust kids - in fact, the chances of us "grown-ups" getting hurt by doing something stupid are probably much greater than kids, considering how sure we are of ourselves. It's that we - at least I - fear that I won't be able to keep up with the responsibility of their safety. So instead of giving them the 95% odds of successfully running backwards across the corridor, I just tell them a flat out no.
Then again, maybe it really is that adults get automatically programmed to reply in negatives. Maybe it's an unconscious initiation rite.
I think someone up there is probably using my life right now to teach his kids the meaning of the words "irony" and "hypocrisy."
Grouchy Adult, signing off.
And the whole time there was just one thought running through your head - Aaaaaaaaarrrrghhhhhhhhh!!!
Why did adults have to be so negative all the time?! Were they programmed to say the words "don't" or "no"? Do they really have no faith in children? Do they really think I'm so stupid as to intentionally burn my hand with an iron? Please, I know it is hot! (from experience...)
I promised myself that when I became an adult, I would never treat kids as though they were incapable to doing anything correctly - I'd let them try new things, make their own mistakes, learn from their mistakes. I'll show the adults around me how it's really done. Now all I needed to do was find myself a kid or two...
I found 45 of them. And in the words of Russell Peters - I turned grouchy adult so fast...!!!
Every request that came my way automatically met with a no.
No, you cannot run in the corridor. No, you cannot jump on the benches. They're kids. They're tiny kids. They don't know any better. I'm the adult around here. I can't let them go haywire. I'll have to say no.
Yep, I became the very adult version I had always told myself I'd never be.
But today, standing at the doorway of a local train, I was just reminiscing about all those times as a kid when I was told not to stand too close to the edge, and I couldn't help but wonder why adults become such boring grouches when we're around kids. Is it that I don't trust my kids? Do I really think they're going to jump out of the window of the bus if it is open too wide?
After mulling over this for 30 minutes in the Bombay local, I came to one simple explanation - fear. I have been given the responsibility of 45 children, and I think this responsibility is scarier than being responsible for a multinational corporation. Because one small incident could end disastrously. Sure, the odds of something going wrong are probably less than 5%, but even that is too much for the side of me that is scared of "what if something goes wrong". It's easy to be responsible for yourself, but not so much for others. Especially when the others belong to someone else, and your careless gaze could be the reason for a family shattering to pieces. I have no problem with my kids running down the stairs, but every time one of them falls and gets hurt, the guilt weighs down as I have to face their parents.
So I don't think the problem is that adults don't trust kids - in fact, the chances of us "grown-ups" getting hurt by doing something stupid are probably much greater than kids, considering how sure we are of ourselves. It's that we - at least I - fear that I won't be able to keep up with the responsibility of their safety. So instead of giving them the 95% odds of successfully running backwards across the corridor, I just tell them a flat out no.
Then again, maybe it really is that adults get automatically programmed to reply in negatives. Maybe it's an unconscious initiation rite.
I think someone up there is probably using my life right now to teach his kids the meaning of the words "irony" and "hypocrisy."
Grouchy Adult, signing off.
No comments:
Post a Comment